And so that was Christmas, over for another year, time to start shopping for next Christmas LOL.
With all the bushfires in our area lately, Mum's Nursing Home made the decision to agree to evacuate when the RFS advised it. There was no immediate threat, but since the home is surrounded by bush with one road out, it was understandable to be cautious. What I didn't know at the time, was where Mum would be evacuated to, or that it wasn't the Manager, who knows the area, who made the decision. I received a text to say they were being evacuated that night, then waited and waited for the call to advise where she was. The call came in at 11.30 pm, I was asleep. The voice on the other end of the phone, told me Mum was in Hunters Hill, and all I could think was, fucking hell, that's so far away, what about Christmas.
Considering she has been thinking it's almost Christmas all year, I did not want her missing out. Luckily, they came back very quickly, she was only there 2 nights. All things considered it was just as well, as they only packed 2 days worth of clothes for her, and she didn't have her makeup. We were all relieved she was back, and we'd be able to see her for Christmas.
I went and picked her up, to take her to my daughters, she was a bit confused, as always, but had a really good time. She did try to claim presents that weren't hers, but hey, if they were good, why not try lol. Our grandson Rossco, loves his Nana Fathers, and sat up next to her on the couch, talking and talking. Despite knowing that she wouldn't of taken in anything he said, he does talk a mile a minute, it was a precious moment. He actually went through a bad time, thinking she had died, and he was terribly upset, so I've had to send pictures to him, via his Mum, just to prove she was still alive lol.
When she started to look like she'd had enough, I took her back up to the home. She seemed tired, but happy. She talked a lot about how everyone had gone away for the holidays, but she does that all the time, and it's not the holidays all the time lol.
Next day, the Nursing Home called me. Mum was really upset and wanting to talk to me. She was so confused, she was crying and saying she didn't know what was happening or where she was, and that she wanted to come home. I had to talk her down, explain to her over and over, that this was where she lived now, and that she just had to walk up to someone and start talking to them to make friends. She seemed okay by the end of the call.
Today, Nursing Home called again, she was anxious, crying, angry, confused, you name it she was it. They had to wake her for breakfast, and she told them she had been up earlier, but was told to go back to bed, as it was too early for breakfast. They tried to tell her that hadn't happened, but she said, and the nurse said the way she said it, was entirely logical, "Then why am I in bed?" She was also worried about her Mum and Dad, and what they'd be thinking if she didn't come home. They have both been dead for quite a few years now, but she did the regression and thought she still lived at home. We made the decision to call her doctor and see if there was anything they could give her to calm her down.
Later today, they called again, she'd had a small dose of valium, and was back to normal, chatting, laughing and very relaxed. She'd played some board games, and seemed to be having fun. I didn't care about any of that, knowing that she wasn't crying anymore was good enough for me.
It just goes to show the fragility of those who suffer from Alzheimers, one simply change or disruption to her routine, and she is lost. While she remembers how to get around the home, to her, it's as if she has just gone in. It reminds me of her Dad, he broke his ankle and when he was back on his feet, Nana had to teach him the things that he hadn't done while he was laid up. We take it for granted, we get up in the morning, we go to the crapper, we get dressed, we have coffee, breakfast, go to work, etc etc. Every day we have our routine, a small adjustment to that routine, crap run out of milk, doesn't change our day, except that we have to pick up some milk. For those who have Alzheimers, it changes their life, they are thrown into turmoil, and have no idea what is going on.
The chair they always sit in, in the lounge, is not there, this is not the table they eat dinner at, this is not my room, everything is too much for them. The more they try and make sense of it, the more anxious they get, the more they regress. And that regression, leads to tears, it leads to pain and suffering. I imagine it would be like waking up from a coma after 25 years, everything has changed, but you don't know how or why, you have to learn to walk again, how to feed yourself, etc. But while if you wake up from a coma, you will have a life again, those with Alzheimers, won't. They will continue on in this world of confusion, the scary world that the rest of us take for granted.
One day, she's an 83 year old great grandmother living in a Nursing Home, forgetful but living her life as best she can. The next she's an 18 year old, crying for her long dead parents, and the home she remembers as being her only home. She's gone from being a smart strong woman, who drove out with sandwiches and water to feed her husband and his fellow brigade members as they battled bushfires. From a woman who with neighbours, beat out a fire on the block next door with wet sacks, to a shadow of what she once was.
I hope that she comes back from this, I know as time goes on she will get worse anyway, but I want her to get back to her forgetful self. The person, who forgets every damn thing you tell her, but who is so happy to see you and share a joke with you. I just want to keep that woman for a while longer, thanks.
Catch yas
Cathy
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