As I sit and ponder whether or not to pluck or shave this errant hair in my chin, I flash back to when I was a hell of a lot younger and had no chin hairs to the birth of my second daughter Caryn.
Caryn was born on the 19th August 1986, 6 days late grrrrrr. Unlike her older sister Caryn liked to ride out the pregnancy low, kicking or resting on my bladder the whole 9 mths. As I got bigger I couldn't manage stairs she was so low, which meant someone else had to do all my running around upstairs for me at work, it was a real hardship not being able to do it LOL. I left work a month before she was born to spend some time with Tara and get everything ready. Didn't take much to get ready as I had everything I needed already, but I did find myself cleaning mold off walls and ceilings, maybe out of boredom, maybe in the hope of bringing on labour.
My husband of the day, lets just refer to him as sperm donor which is much more polite than what we normally call him, had asked his brother to come and stay with us so he could look after Tara while I was in hospital. Scott was a gem, he was a chef, and boy did we eat good in that time. The morning of the 19th I was having my usual check up and while waiting could feel an annoying back pain. Nothing really surprising since I was 9 mths pregnant. My doctor told me that if she wasn't born over the weekend they'd induce me on Monday, but that I couldn't have her that day as it was his sons birthday and he had a party to attend. I laughed with him, but before I left I turned back as another back pain hit me and said, sorry but it is going to be today. I drove up to where the sperm donor worked and told him to make sure to come straight home, do not go to the pub for a beer or two, come straight home as I was having the baby today. He told me I couldn't possible know but sure he'd come straight home, HAH.
As the day wore on my back pain spread, but still not enough to go to the hospital. At about 4 pm and still no sign of the errant sperm donor (due back at 3), I asked Scott to drive me to the hospital. Now as much as I always loved his cooking, let me tell you, don't ever ask him to drive you to the hospital while your in labour, even if it is just up the road. He has a habit of talking to you while driving which is fine, but he also looks at you. Tara is bouncing away in the back seat having a great old time, while her mother is in the front in agony watching as Scott drives us straight towards a garbage truck, swerving at the last minute as his eyes find the road once more.
Luckily we all arrived in one piece, I asked him to go over to the pub and find his brother and marched on in. Got checked out and started the labour walk, up and down the corridor with other soon to be mums all in various stages of labour, but one thing stood out, I was the only one without a partner. By 5.30 pm I knew that I couldn't keep walking, so I staggered up to the nurses and was taken to the labour ward, much nicer than the one I was in with Tara, and I was alone, although able to hear the cries of other woman. The sperm donor finally arrived and was ushered in at the same time as the doctor who was supposed to give me an epidural arrived. The sperm donor reeked of beer and the nurses all looked at him with disgust, I grabbed his thumb and rebroke it for him LOL. It had only just healed, he did try and pull it away but I held on for dear life and snap. The doctor said I was too far along for an epidural, I told him yeh I know I told them not to call you. As the clock ticked over the urge to push was strong, when I could hear a voice from the corridor, 'Wait wait, don't let her push yet'. My doctor had arrived. He scooted onto the stool just in time to catch Caryn. It was actually a really good labour, pretty painless till the end and she was delivered so easily.
One look at her little face and I knew I couldn't call her Aleisha or Simone, she wasn't either of them, so it was Caryn Aleisha, and yes that's how the Aleisha is supposed to be spelt LOL.
Two completely different labours and two completely different looking but oh so beautiful baby girls. With Tara I was the lone patient in the hospital, with Caryn it was packed, I couldn't wait to get out of there and sleep in my own bed, even if the sperm donor was there too.
Caryn, you didn't feed well as you know cause I've told you countless times :), and the nurse just kept telling me to have patience. I finally had had enough and walked up to the clinic and told the nurse on duty, she's been fed and changed, you get her to shut up, before taking Tara to the park across the road. I went back 15 mins later to the sounds of Caryn still crying and the nurse on the phone to her boss almost crying as she struggled to get you to settle. Grabbing you I told her that I would never take another one of my children to their clinic, marched home and called my doctor who recommended a part soy formula. We never looked back. You loved that stuff, and started sleeping normally and putting on weight for the first time in 6 weeks.
You were advanced at sitting up and attempting to crawl, but at 4 mths we discovered you had a dislocated hip and had probably had it from birth. So it was into a plaster for you and then a brace. Don't worry I won't post the embarrassing brace pic LOL. Finally you were free and able to walk, and then before I knew it you were running. You never slowed down always on the go doing something or other. It was during this time that I finally left the sperm donor, having had enough of his constant drinking and mental abuse. We were 3 girls on our own and we loved it.
I am so proud of you and all you have achieved and are continuing to achieve. Many people would doubt your will to succeed when you got pregnant at 16, but you continued to go to school till it got to much, the did school at home before and after the birth of your son. You worked at crap jobs to get some money for the two of you, and I watched you with pride. You are now married and have had 2 other children, and then you took on a foster child. 3 children under the age of 3 with 2 of them babys and you have Jayden to take to school when you have him. And there is Jacob, your stepson, who is not with you guys full time but when he's down for holidays your house is overflowing. And still you study, continuing your dream.
I seriously don't know how you do it, but do it everyday you do. I do know that you are a strong woman and if anyone can deal with it all it's you. Despite your complaints about the mounds of washing littering your lounge room, you still manage to have a laugh, usually at yourself.
So to my beautiful second daughter, breaking of small appliances, mother full and part time to 5, student, wife, and friend, I say Happy Birthday. I love you despite the many breakages LOL, and I'm proud of you every single day.
Catch ya
Cathy
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